It's 1:37 on the morning of August 3, 2006. I'm up because I'm writing a paper. Well this is the anti-productivity blog, so the truth is I haven't started writing the paper. But this isn't any old Soc paper that I haven't read for yet. It's the last one. I'm kinda sad that I won't have anymore of these sleepless nights to create mediocre essays on social institutions and constructs that rule our lives. A little disappointed that I won't be going to a lecture that I fight to stay awake in. A bit reluctant to let go of my identity as "student."
This will be the last paper that I turn in for a grade as an undergrad. I don't know how I should be feeling about that exactly. Don't get me wrong. I'm looking forward to the coming weeks of watching TV guilt free, going to sleep whenever the hell I need to, and reading for pleasure. But I've only ever been a kid going to class. It really freaks me out that the grown ups that I work with call me "Erlynne" in a most serious tone with no idea that my kiddie friends call me "Erl the girl," "Erl the pearl," "Erly Berly," and "Life Partner." I don't want to grow up.
That's the real reason for this post. The longer I put off writing the paper, the little while longer I get to be the me I've always been. After this week I'm supposed to start looking for a job that will pay me enough to live.
Moral of the blog: It sucks to get older. That's why they invented Botox and sports cars.
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